All I ever wanted.

The only thing in life I have ever known I wanted to do was be a mother. I cannot even remember my life before she came along. I think that is because from the very second I knew I was having a baby my life actually began. 

I remember it like it was yesterday. I thought she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I even said to my mother, "she is so pretty." I kept saying it like no one heard me and it was all I could say. About 30 hours after entering the hospital, 2 jacuzzi baths, walking around the birthing floor of the hospital, two epidurals, some Stadol (and flying pink and blue elephants in the room - I totally remember this), this magical person appeared at 12:21 am at 8 pounds and 10 ounces. I am just a mere few hours away from the 5 year anniversary of the event. I cannot even believe it. I wondered what she would look like, what her first words would be, and how I would have enough days to let her wear all those adorable clothes hanging in her closet?

Now, I find myslef thinking I thought I knew what love was then. But, Geez Louise! Now, it is even better. The first time she said "Uh Oh", and "Mama", and grabbed my finger, threw her paci on the floor, and stood up in her crib, and sat up on her own, and smiled, and laughed...I just kept falling for her. I remember being so tired in college, and all I needed was to go to sleep. And then she would cry, I would open the door to her room, and she'd be standing up in her crib smiling. She had only been walking for about a week when she broke her leg. I was devastated but she taught herself to walk in a cast with her leg bent. She is so determined! And she knows how to pull you in!

I loved how she would take a bottle and fall asleep on me at night. I miss those days....kinda. I would lay her in her crib, pray over her, pray to God to keep us safe in our journey together. And it has been a journey. But she was my lifesaver, my "turn-around-God-wake-me-up-finally moment". She was what pushed me through college, and pushed me to make a better life for myslef and for her. The second I laid eyes on her I was changed forever. And so has anyone else that has ever met her. She tends to take up all the space in the room, to demand your attention, to devour your senses. She is dominant, brave, matter-of-fact, assertive, sassy, and sensitive all at the same time.....and the sweetest thing you have ever met in your life! She has such love for life and people. She has taught me about selflessness and discipline, and determination, and suffering. She has taught me love, and fear, and joy just by breathing.

To GA: 

I love that dashing blond hair and big blue eyes, sweet little hands and feet, and that precious little voice. Even though you say Mama like 100 times a day now!  I love that every night when I say, "what's your favorite thing you did today?" , you always say, "being with you" - even if I only saw you for 30 minutes all day! I am so glad that you didn't mind me photographing every little millisecond of your life the first years, and that you are so photogenic. Oh, where do you get that from??? I love that we both love nite nites and we love to watch movies, cuddle, and sometimes take naps together. I wish that I had a video of you every day. You are so funny. you have a quick wit about you. you are smart. and sassy. and you know it.... and absolutely the best kiss ever!!! You are the best face to wake up to. I love how when you wake up, you always stretch your body with your eyes closed, and then let out a big sigh. You have done that since you were born. You still do it. And every day I see you do that, it takes me back to that night at 12:21am when you captured my heart and my life. Georgia Anne, these have been the best 5 years of my life.

Love, Mama!

A recap of the best:

 

Mama Loves You Sweet Girl! 

My L.o.t. Rox update:

I mainly started blogging last year so that I could whine about all the things that got on my nerves about living in Roxboro.  Blogging was a good try for me because it was FREE and I couldn't really afford a therapist. Trust me, not much has changed - well, except for the fact that I probably still need a therapist. 

Let's discuss...

Here are all the things that I have discovered will always get on my nerves/pet peeves:

1) Wake up phone calls -  some people have learned that you shouldn't wake me up - no matter what the circumstances are. Some people are yet to figure this out.The only person I really let slide is my Mama cause I always love to chat with her in the mornings (and you can't get feisty with yo' Mama even if it is before 8am).

2) the Wal-Mart factor - Seriously...you know that it is impossible to go to the Wal-mart without seeing someone you know. I have quite honestly started skimming the parking lot for cars of those whom I wish NOT to run into. Here is what I have discovered are the best times to go to the Wal-mart to avoid said run-ins:  Tuesday nights after 6:00, Wednesday nights after 7:00 (a lot of people are at church), and Sunday mornings before 9am. You are Welcome :) If you absolutely have to go there, be aware of your surroundings. I pretend not to see people all the time. That is SO bad I know. But some days you just don't feel like 'catching up' while your child plays games on your cell, and people are staring at you like get-out-of-the-way. I hate it when people stop mid-aisle for a reunion. Which always begins with, "how's your Mama?"

3) Why is the frazlin' McDonalds drive-thru line always backed up into the road? I mean how hard should it be for a girl to get a McCafe Caramel Mocha Skinny Latte on demand? I totally miss the Micki-D's at the top of the Hill at the King Bee. And the one in the Wal-Mart does not count....(see # 2) Y'all feel me? ...And speaking of things I miss... remember when Wendy's had a salad / hot bar? DANG I miss those days. This is where I learned of my love for spiral pasta and tomato sauce. AND I miss the Sonic. Who really shops at Rite-Aid anyway??? I am a CVS girl. I would much rather have the Sonic back and hit up a Route 44 Diet Cherry Limeade instead of a Px refill.... Who is with me????

 I know that these things are minor but it would make life more bearable if they could maybe open a Target (to split the Wal-mart crowd and bring on the quality goods), and get another McDonalds, and bring back the Sonic. I am talking quality of life here for the Rox. If you are not from the Rox, be daggone thankful if you can reach a target in a 10-15 mile radius.

BUT, here is what I wouldn't change for nothin' - 

1. Being near my family. (however dysfunctional we may be ;) 

2. Making new friends and growing close to the old ones. I LOVE my Raleigh girls a ton and I MISS them EVERY day, I think of them EVERY day, I PRAY for them still,  but God has blessed me with some extremely wonderful friends since I have moved back home. They make life dreamy and the best part is that they are all my sisters in Christ. Sean handpicked out one for me last year when we were engaged and he said that he thought we would grow to be good friends one day. I told him he was crazy and now I just love her to death. See how God works? And I love me some Sean Austin for encouraging me to do so! I was so frustrated when I first moved home. I couldn't get my hands on my friends enough because they were all so far away. I felt like I was left out of everything here.  Even at some family gatherings, I am sometimes the "outsider" but I have learned that it is OK.  And even some friends BECAME family. God has also blessed me with one incredible friend at church which was an answered prayer for me. Now I find myslef having trouble splitting my time. What a blessing! 

3. Being married to a crazy, funny, handsome, and DRIVE-ME-CRAZY man! I KNOW I drive him twice as crazy! Oh what a year it has almost been. I wouldn't change it for nothin!!!!! We are definitely a unique couple and what we have works for US! We have so much more learnin' to do but we are well on our way. What we have is OURS and nobody can ever take that away. Georgia Anne keeps us laughing all the time. Tonight we all 3 laughed at the table during dinner over something crazy and I thought it was such a cliche but it was just like sitting and watching it in a movie. There we are cracking up at the simplest things, and our life is just revolving around us and we don't even notice. We just roll through our days and take it as it comes. 

So.... all in all, the Rox has sucked me in Y'all. .

Literally, I'm stuck here.

Who could leave all this?

The last of the 20's

Is 30 the new 20? Is it really? That's what everyone keeps saying as I turned 29 on Tuesday last week. All I gotta say is,

BRING IT ON 30 -

(hey, it's better than the alternative anyway)

 Lets hope by next year that the saying is still true! I am going to do something fab when I turn 30. Any ideas? I am the first of all my besties to turn 30. I say RoAd TrIp ladies!!!!

 I haven't even been 29 for a week yet and I have had mega hip pain this week, a twisted ankle, and I am trying to come to grips with the fact that my doctor says that these are ma' probalem....

remember these????

I have to find a compromise over Christmas. I went to one store today to search for NOT.old. lady.cute.shoes and I came up with 2 inter-shoe-departments: HOT! or GRANDMA! Where is the middle ground people?

ANYWHO -

I had such a fabulous B-day (week) !!!!! Intercepting Birthday calls and 135+ Facey messages made it so special! I also got to spend some time with many of my faves and receive some VERY thoughtful and fun gifts!!!!
 Royal Treatment: I Began celebrating by taking my baby, my mama, and my MIL to Disney Princess on Ice. I still do not know who had more fun of the four of us. It always comes to RBC right before my Birthday and I've always wanted to go.  This year....it was on! Thank you Sean Austin :)

This is why I love parenting - joy on your child's face is priceless!!! What is NOT priceless is paying $12 for a snowcone in a Tiana cup. But Hey, we are princesses right?

Completely magical. 

Check out the B-day goods:

magical candelabras 

love me some cards - I always save them!

LOVE LOVE LOVE - circa 1991 - Rmember PBS television on channel 4???? anyone??? It even smells vintage and it has some stories about the advent, the nativity, and so forth that I have been reading to GA when we do her advent calendar at night. 

get ready for canning season y'all!

THE HELP movie - so freaking excited and new leopard rainboots - don't be a hater, I love me some rain boots. AND some nice vino, notecard, and soap collections - All my favorite things!

  I ALWAYS have dinner at my mama's for my B-day- STANDARD! 

Daddy ALWAYS takes me to lunch. 

Memaw and Tracie always call and sing to me. 

Jenn and D' always call and sing to me ;)

And it just so happens that the annual Christmas dinner and photoshoot with some of my best ladies commences that week every year! Cropping of said photos was indeed necessary....

And since my birthday is in December, I get the pleasure of celebrating it throughout the month of December, while doing many of my favorite things: spending time with family and friends, the Christmas PARADE (I am a HUGE fan!), and food! Can I get an AMEN????? Thank you!!!!Christmas parade in true Rox fashion is coming up. Stay TUNED!

Continue to share the love - It's CHRISTmas y'all!

This CrAzY girl is RANTING today!

I shall begin with ranting: 

I am in yet another funk. No bloggy love this week for the Rox. I am in fact quite jealous of all my favorite bloggers who have the most entertaining posts this week. Let's discuss.

Beefy got to go to the SC State Fair. The land of my birth and I myself have never been. It looks like much fun. Jealousy set in, in the worst way.  And the fact that she's home with the hubs for 3 weeks is sickening. I can't even talk to her. I thought about texting and then I thought, I am at work. I can't. I shouldn't.  Oh wait, but she's home. Then I just gets jealous again. And my vote: for the past 3 weeks, her posts, most entertaining.

Ms. Lindsey over @ Mommy Teaches! has the sweetest little post about mamas and babies and how that all happens. Bible verses for reference, musical options, and all. Score for my soul this morning.

Confession's of a 20 Something: PLL gets yet again another prize. How bout' this from "Confessions of an almost 30 Something"....I want a prize too daggone it {insert inappropriate name calling}. This ain't about you PLL, it's about me and the funk I'm in. You are as always, ever-so-entertaining. 

The best thing that has happened this week is Peanut Butter M&M's in fun size packages in the boss' office. Like I really need that. I'm bout' to go get one.

Ok I'm back. I actually got 2.

So This morning, I was awakened at 4:55 with the dumbest of all reasons from that who woke me up. I shall not name initials at this point. How many times do I need to explain that should you need to wake me up for such randomness...I think NOT. Let me repeat. NOT?  Not everyone can fall back asleep that easy. Grrrrrrrrrrr..... 

Also, I feel it is quite inappropriate to call anyone before 9:00. How are you sure that they are not sleeping late on purpose?  Don't screw it up for them. 

 Overall, not myself this week. 

I'm later to work than normal. I'm tired. I'm jealous. 

I haven't cleaned the recycling off my desk in 3 days. 

I need a prize. 

You think you know someone....

Long time..... No blog. I have missed it for sure. I have been such a busy girl this week and I am hoping this week will leave more time for writing!

This one is ABOUT ME. One of my favorite things to do is learn about other people and what their interests are. I love finding common interests with others and I love meeting new people and making new friends. I am also a list-person. I love making lists as you can see in number 16 below. While searching FB over the weekend, and catching up on some blog reads, I copied these from  a note I had posted on FB back in January of 2009. Good Gracious how time flies and how things CHANGE. I know I have updated these since my original post on FB as well. I still think it is interesting to see how things change. I think everyone should journal or keep some sort of written journey of their lives. Looking back on how far we have come is very refreshing and can be a good way to assess goals and priorities. Now, I choose to keep mine through blogging :) I think this is fun but you may be completely bored and just simply need sources of entertainment which you find from Life...On the Rox! 

Here is 40 random things about ME in NO particular order(via January 2009) ~ new responses are in red : ) 
1. My daughter is also my lifesaver
2. I love to shop at thrift stores
3. I take naps like it's my day job (this was when GA was smaller and I had time in-between classes at MC - now naps are only reserved for Sundays)
4. I love Jesus (even more!)
5. I'm an obsessive cleaner ~ I vacuum EVERY day (yea right...now I'm lucky to do it 1-2 times per week. I do love some clean hardwood floors though! )

6. When I am mad at you, or nervous, or if you are getting on my nerves.... I can't make eye contact with you (hasn't changed)
7. I seriously think I have ADHD - at least a little - I can't sit still!
8. I LOVE to clip coupons! It's like shopping with NO money! (Better at this now)
9. I think that family is important over all things
10. I eat salad with no dressing at all (dressing is disgusting, slimy, and it makes your food sloppy)
11. I love to get my nails done even if I have NO money for groceries ( I don't get my nails done anymore. Now I only buy groceries...with a coupon of course!)
12. I like to take really hot baths until the water runs out (shhhhhhhh...Don't tell Sean Austin about the water!)
13. I love Diet Coke like u would not believe!  (some things never change...)
14. I love NC State (Go Pack!!!....You 'da Bomb.com, Love me some red & white!)
15. I go to Meredith for all the nice jewelry - The Curse of the Onyx :) - (got it and graduated since then- Go me!)
16. I make a to-do list every day on recycled paper scraps
17. I am rarely on time for anything unless it's real important (I typically run 10-15 minutes late for work almost every day. I really want to be better at morning routines. I am NOT a morning person and never have been)
18. I have a bad habit of saying I'll do something, then I won't do it...like come by your house to visit... ( I forget, what can I say???...)
19. I love a little text message even though it takes me forever to write back ( I semi hate texting now and talking on the phone is one of my not-so-faves!) - Have you read my Pet Peeves on Voicemails? )
20. I like to eat a lot of carbs..then take a long NAP...I LOVE NAPS!
21. My favorite Candy is Circus Peanuts (Standard!)
22. I am addicted to Smashbox cosmetics (thank you random person at ULTA) - (this was a slight disagreement while I lived in Raleigh and experimented outside of my classic Merle Norman regimens....Thank goodness I'm back to my senses now. )
23. I organize my closet according to color and length of clothing.
24. I procrastinate like it's my day job (but I still get it done!)
25. I own SEVERAL large Rubbermaid containers of ribbon
26. My nicknames are Ber, Baby-D, and Baby Dunk
27. I think Mayonnaise should be banned from use on food (don't even get me started!)
28. I cannot sleep unless I know what I'm gonna wear the next day
29. I love Lean Cuisine's (ewww... what was I thinking? - clearly this was post 10-pound loss)
30. I love to write people notes and cards
31. I love to get notes and cards
32. My favorite color is pink (any shade)
33. I eat an apple every day (banana too!)
34. I love walking at Reedy Creek Trail behind Meredith (miss these days for real - now I walk in Lochridge, not nearly as fun or pretty)
35. I hate going to the post office (DANG I hate the post office!)
36. I secretly love moving...anywhere..I love to unpack and organize in a new place (not even kidding...as long as I don't have to actually move the boxes ;)
37. I hate talking on the phone...unless I really love u
38. I cannot go to bed before 12:00AM ..it's impossible
39. I wear heels every day to work - I'm getting too old for this....good for your calf muscles though.But flats make me feel short and dumpy!
40. I love ketchup with almost everything (Standard!...Sometimes I eat certain foods just so I can consume ketchup. Its full of licopene? which fights cancer and gives you youthful skin so I should be well preserved in several more years.)

I stole this part from Momfessions) This list was "100 things about me" but I condensed :)

 Things about me and my bloggin’ self:
- well there was 40 things up yonder so...I think that was enough.

Things about my relationship with Jesus:
1. There have been times in my life where the relationship was stronger or more powerful in my life. I think God works in us that way. It cannot be easy all the time or we would never feel his presence when we need it most. 

2. I accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was in elementary school at Grace United Methodist Church. Although I don't fully think I understood it then, but I do now more than ever. The relationship has always been with me which I believe has protected me from many things. I have still experienced a lot of heartache which most people will go a lifetime without ever experiencing. But, I got through it because of my relationship with the Lord.

3. It is a daily learning experience.

Things about my family:
- should I even go there? ? ? ? ?

- I come from a divorced family, which doubled into 2 more families. Geez Louise. Holidays are crazy busy for me. 

- I also have Sean's family to consider which makes Holidays even more FUN!

- Overall, lots of people who have supported me through the years and more people to love GA 

- there are many people I consider my family even though they are not blood-relation.

Things I like to do:
- BLOG...duh. 

- Garden and can things 

- organize things

- make craft projects ( I love any kind of project)

- visit aquariums (one of my faves)!

- coupon shop

- Hang out with Sean and GA

- Plan parties and events! 

- Sew

- recycle 

- make photobooks :)

Movies I Enjoy:

- Fireproof

- The Notebook

-The Blind Side 

- One Night with the King

- The Other Boleyn Girl

- Wedding Crashers

- Double Jeopardy 
- The Help (oh my It was so GOOD!) 

 
Five books I enjoy:

- The Help (oh my It was so GOOD!) 

- The Awakening

- Rebecca

- Olivia

- The 5 Love languages

 “Favorites”:
- photographs & photography

- #7 Combo from Chic-fil-A with Fruit and Diet Lemonade

- Lady Antebellum & Jason Aldean

- Girl's Night Out 

- Burts Bees Chapstick

- Spaghetti with Garden Sauce (no meat)
- I love to drink Ginger Ale 

Verses I love:
- Proverbs 31 
¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find?
   She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
   and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
   all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
   and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
   bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
   she provides food for her family
   and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
   out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
   her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
   and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
   and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
   and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
   for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
   she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
   where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
   and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
   she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
   and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
   and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
   her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
   but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
- Lamentations  Chapter 3:

22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
   for his compassions never fail.
²³ They are new every morning;
   great is your faithfulness.
²⁴ I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
   therefore I will wait for him.”

Things I’d do if money were not object:
- Buy a monogramming machine 

- add another bathroom to my house (or sell it and move to the country-side of the Rox)

- Spend money on services for children that needed it. 

- Travel More

Cool things I’ve done:
- traveled across the country in 2 days driving (from Atlanta to Seattle), gone for 6 weeks while visiting Atlanta, Seattle, Los Angeles, and San Francisco - all for work but it was a good experience!

- taken my photograph at the "booked-in" section of the Person County jail, just for fun. I wanted to wear an orange jump suit and have my picture taken in front of the big ruler....DONE!

Five places I would love to visit:
- Savannah, Georgia 

- Charleston, SC

- Disney World with Georgia Anne 

- All the NC lighthouses...I have never seen any :(

- The Aquariums in Atlanta and Australia

Things I dislike:
-mayonnaise

- salad dressings 

- seafood

- shopping carts that make noise or wobble 

- conversations before 9 AM or breakfast, or Diet Coke

- The News and Observer 

- prejudgments 

Things I don’t think I’ll ever do:
- bungee jump 

- sky dive

Things I say every day:
 - I love You 

- Seriously? 

- You have got to be kidding me...

- congratulations (inside joke in our house)

If you made it through all this "congratulations." I am sure there were plenty of times you wanted to click the little red X in the upper right of your screen. Otherwise, you may quite frankly be stalking me because I don't know if this was even entertaining. However, I would love to know you!!! Write your own "about me" blog and post! I would love to read it! 

I had such a great weekend and I hope you did to!